Kaetlin Perna
December 1, 2006

I have some big news for you all. But you're going to have to wait. Okay, not really, you're going to have to spend a few minutes reading this lovely column of mine to find out the big news. Lately, I've been busy. So busy in fact that it's killing my social life and my sleep cycle. "Oh I have to do this, oh God, I need to do that." Constant anxiety, constant moodiness, constant depressive fits, constant exhaustion where coffee doesn't do anything for me anymore. What's causing this you ask? Well... you're looking at it: my writing.

Recently in the past few months, I've just stopped writing all together for weeks at a time, not because I'm blocked, not because the ideas aren't flowing, but because I just don't feel like it, and I'm young enough to know that a passion you have shouldn't be something you feel mediocre about frequently. I've gotten so overwhelmed that I had to put myself on a schedule of things that I'll be doing for that certain day of the week. Always busy, always driven, always wanting to be something, knowing that making my mark is right around the corner. My writing is what consumes me, and that's okay, but there comes a point where you have to say: "Hey jerk, breathe, do something you enjoy once in awhile."

Here is a lineup of my projects accumulated since early August. I compiled a zine called "Year of the Kaet;" issue one is out already, and am laying out issue two; I headlined my own open mic tour wherein I just finished a nine minute photo-prose documentary based around it; I'm writing a play called "Requiem" about letting go and finding success in your own individuality; I'm writing another play called "New York State of Mind" about three different adventures in NYC; I created a webseries called "The Depressive Diaries of Kaetlin Perna" (which was originally supposed to be my way of dealing with my first two week non-writing episode); I'm in pre-production for a short film I'm directing called "Andrea X" written by Jason Quackenbush; and on the side, I continue to write prose, and coming back to my home, being this my column.

For the last six weeks, I've been crushing everything in, trying to get as much done as possible (finishing a film and in preproduction for another!) It's been tiring trying to get everything accomplished but I think I need to give myself a deadline, a time to get ahead of myself. Why? Because I'm burning out in general, and I might as well burn myself out when I'm already running on fumes from my reserve. There is nothing stopping me anyway, to be honest. I'm proud of what I've done and am extremely appreciative of all you, my readers, who've supported me from the very beginning and listened as I threw ideas on you.

Now brings me to the big news: For the month of December, I am taking a writing hiatus. Like I said, I'm completely burned out. This month will be focused on Christmas, arts and crafts, baking cookies for my neighbors and partying like it's 1972 at Studio 54 (complete with acid!). I will continue to publish this column during December, and finish the "Depressive Diaries" at Episode 10 until January where I'll be back to new and not so tired all the time. I will write, I will call... don't worry, I'm still here. I will be back and better than ever!